Detour

Well, I have been Getting My Ass Handed To Me by departments of teacher certification in both Arizona and Massachusetts. The fact that I barely know how to spell Massachusetts, as indicated by the red line under my multiple tries, is perhaps the Universe's way of telling me that I shouldn't move there. I'm only joking when I say this, as MA DOES have this much going for it: the folks at the MDE don't yell at quite the decibel level that the folks at the ADE do.

Now, my time in Asia has taught me to go with the flow, that worrying is futile, and the only thing created by worrying is lines in one's forehead. I've learned how to have faith and know that everything always works out as it should. SO....to that effect, while my career may be veering frighteningly off course at breakneck speed for the time being, I have compiled a list of other possible professions that I can explore during this time of temporary road blocks:

-Beekeeper
-Telemarketer
-Burlesque dancer (not to be confused with stripper)
-Elevator operator
-One of the lost cosmonauts
-A participant in the wife carrying contest

By the way, the fact that the U.S. does not have universal teacher certification from state to state is an absolute crime. And California???? Don't get me started on California. I don't know who California thinks it is. No one is apparently good enough for it. It's sitting there on its west coast perch all, "Ooooo, just LOOK at my beautiful, frothy, glistening shoreline and abundant population of English language learners (I mention this because working with ELLs is my area of expertise and true passion in life). You wanna come here and teach?? Suck my redwoods, biatch!"

Forgive me. I worked for almost 13 hours today, and it is quite possible that the beer I smelled earlier in the lobby of my condo has actually succeeded in getting me drunk.

Any career suggestions/magic wands for making certificates appear out of thin air/talismans (talismans or talismen?? Doesn't it seem like it should be the latter?) for warding off evil department of education spirits would be greatly appreciated.

I'm gonna go sleep it off.